September 17th, 2017
It was my pleasure to mediate in a dispute last week. Reflecting on what worked and did not work, I wanted to share five ideas that I think you may find particularly useful.
September 11th, 2017
When things go wrong in a negotiation often there is a quick escalation, conflict increases and the two stinky twins of BO (blaming others) and BS (blaming self) become pronounced. What is the result? Escalation, litigation and entrenchment. I want to suggest three ideas for a better way.
September 4th, 2017
In an experiment by neuroscientists participants were given $10 dollars and were told they needed to share the amount with another party. If the other party accepted the offer they could keep the difference. This resulted in some interesting findings that were found to tie directly into negotiations. The commentary that follows could be used in any negotiation including those with the IRS and in other venues where one party seems to have an upper hand.
August 28th, 2017
This past week I was involved in a mediation related to succession planning in a very successful family owned business. I had been recommended for the mediation as a former IRS employee, business valuer with an understanding of business acumen and the ability to carry out the task with complete confidentiality. I sometimes say that I am like a priest. That is an advantage to mediation in that I can complete the mediation with complete confidentiality unless I am aware of any form of sexual, child or elderly abuse. This allows the parties to share things regarding their businesses and personal relationships within the business that have a bearing on addressing their concerns.
August 21st, 2017
I have blogged on How to get along with difficult people, dealing with difficult people, and managing difficult conversations. However, have you thought about your own thoughts before you begin a difficult conversation?
August 13th, 2017
The following is a guest blog post by Erika Garms, PhD, a friend and a truly insightful neuroscientist that has some very good ideas for you.
I’m sorry to say that I’ve worked for plenty of dysfunctional and inefficient organizations. Perhaps many of you could say the same. As a result, I developed a burning desire to build healthier, and higher-performing workplaces for the sake of organizational results but also for the individuals who spend a third of their days within them. Five years ago, I founded consulting firm WorkingSmarts, Inc. to build healthy and high-performing workplaces. More specifically, I help organizations to become brain-friendly by applying simple truths about how the brain works, to management and organizational dynamics.
August 6th, 2017
I know as a negotiator one of the most important elements towards reaching an agreement in a negotiation is to build and have trust. In order to have trust it is important to build a relationship with the other party. This is true in any negotiation, but especially with the IRS.
July 31st, 2017
As a reader of this blog you know I focus on helping clients resolve conflict and negotiate winning solutions. Today I want to focus on the very real issue of being mortal and end of life decisions. I can’t think of a more serious conflict between our medical communities, a dying patient and family members. This article takes several of the insights from Dr. Atul Gawande book, Being Mortal, that address an area often full of potential conflict with family members, the dying patient and the medical community. Dr. Atul Gawande offers great insights related to family conflict and death punctuating key elements with very insightful stories that help bring these issues home.
July 24th, 2017
Having a very close relative that is at polar opposites with me politically is hard, but I love him. Others have asked how do you do it? That is if you both feel very strongly in your beliefs how can you deal with these very strong polar opposite perspectives? I have found an article that explains it from the Greater Good Science Center exploring neuroscience and how we interact with one another. This makes sense to me so I wanted to go over it with you and maybe you may want to share this with others too.
July 17th, 2017
On May 22, 2017 I provided a blog on Emotional Intelligence and Negotiations. I have since received feedback and additional information that you may find useful. I wanted to share this with you for you and for you to help your clients, friends and family.